Yep, another late holiday post from your favorite sassy blogger. At least you know I’m keeping it real, right? For those of you keeping score, that’s two late holiday posts in a row — Thanksgiving and Christmas. And since I didn’t even write a Halloween post, I guess you could say I’m three for three. Yep, those are some real #blogginggoals.
If you read this blog regularly, then you know that I don’t make apologies for my imperfections. I embrace them — #youdoyou, right? (as long as you’re not hurting someone else). But I do like to explain myself. Not to glorify my missteps, feel justified or receive forgiveness, but rather to reflect in the reasons why and look for the lesson. Also, parenting is a like one giant community and sometimes someone else needs to hear that another mom doesn’t have her sh*t together. With all the beautiful social media posts of smiling, matching families and perfectly set tables, you may feel like the only slacker parent you know. New flash: YOU’RE NOT! So to all you other less-than-perfect moms (and dads) out there, I got you, girl! [I got you, too, boy!]
In a nutshell, Christmas was a real sh*tshow for me this year and posting late is just the icing on the cake. Maybe I am becoming more of a grinch as I get older, but before you more perfect parents chastise, criticize, judge or shun me, listen to my three big reasons for missing the boat on a timely holiday post this year and cut me some slack. Or don’t. #youdoyou, remember?
- I wasn’t feeling it. Okay, so you’ve heard me say this before. And it is a little lame. But I’m 46 and my kids are teenagers. They don’t want or need the pomp and circumstance, thankfully. I started scaling back in 2014 … and in 2015 … and 2016. Then 2017 was the big one. Nary a stocking, wreath, tree light, candle or stitch of tinsel at the Tarr household that year. Or this year, either. [By the way, does anyone under 75 still decorate with tinsel?] The irony is, I love Christmas. Just not for a whole month. As an anxious and easily frazzled person (working on it! #2019personalgrowthgoals), I prefer my holidays limited to one day. Thirty-six hours, tops! Four weeks of stressing over gifts no one needs, holiday cards no one reads, decorations no one sees and food no one eats (okay, that one’s not true) is just too much for me to handle — so I’ve chosen not to any more. We’ve traded needless gifts for family vacations and experiences for the past few years and I think everyone is happier. [Side bar for all my Jewish friends: Big ups to you for enduring eight magical nights of Chanukah — More power to ‘ya!]
- The second reason for the lack of holiday cheer here at casa Tarr is a bit of a secret still, so keep it on the DL, okay? … We are putting our house on the market in January to sell, which means it is all about omission, not addition, up in here, baby! To quote the realtor and stager, “Disassociate yourself from your home, de-personalize and commit to the process.” You got it, ladies. No need to tell me twice! Elf on the Shelf (oh, thank goodness those days are long gone!), Grandma’s hand-stitched stockings and a big ‘ole pine-needle-dropping Christmas tree had no place in the Tarr house this year. Because of this directive from the realtor, I felt justified in my decision to go decoration-free again. It isn’t curmudgeonly, its prudent. Besides, I’m too busy shopping for “neutral” wall prints and fighting with the boys to keep their bathrooms clean.
- And for reason number three, I’m going all in and pulling out the sympathy card. Since last Friday, I’ve been down with a nasty case of the flu (at least I think that’s what it is) and am only finally starting to feel slightly human again. Slightly. Needless to say, even if I was feeling guilty about not decorating and decided to pull-off a last-minute winter wonderland, it wasn’t happening. Instead, my family went off on the NYC holiday we planned while I stayed home on the couch. If you know me at all IRL, I seldom get ill. GI issues? Sure. Complications from Hashimoto’s? Yes. Soreness after leg day at the gym? Absolutely. But a full-blown illness? Hardly. It happens maybe once per year, but when it does, watch out because it’s bad … Just not usually for this long. We are almost a week in and I’m still weak as hell. Silver lining: I reached my year-end goal weight, so there’s that. Getting back to the gym (hopefully next week, fingers crossed) is not going to be easy, so if any of my @MainlineHealthAndFitness peeps see me “resting,” please check my vitals and feel free to give me a grain-free, whey-free protein ball to revive me.
Maybe you think I’ve once again ruined the holidays for my kids. Maybe you think I’m still a Christmas grinch. Or maybe you felt some compassion and humanity and decided to let me live #mybestlife exactly how I need to during this season in order to survive. [Thank you, @msrachelhollis and @mrdavehollis for teaching me this during the #last90dayschallenge.]
To avoid becoming two days late and two dollars short (interest!), I am squeaking out this tardy yet heartfelt Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays wish to all my family, friends and dedicated readers. I have truly enjoyed receiving all your thoughtful messages and stunning family cards, but you won’t be getting one in return. Your social media posts would make Martha Stewart jealous, but you won’t get any new ideas for next year from me. (Unless you count my husband’s Instagram post of the boys buying kicks and drinking sugary drinks in NYC). Instead, I’m posting one from 2008, when Zachary the Elf and a four-foot-tall dancing Santa stressed us out nightly, and an inflatable Santa Elmo lived on our front lawn among the reindeer dust. Ahh, to be young and full of Christmas spirit.
-LJDT
P.S. Please spread the love and share this blog with any other parents you know who sometimes struggle to keep up from time to time. Also, I’d love a repost, retweet and even more subscriber in 2019. #makeithappen
