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Midlife Moxie and Muscle

The blog formerly known as Roses and Armpits — now older, wiser, stronger, bolder

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Midlife Moxie and Muscle

The blog formerly known as Roses and Armpits — now older, wiser, stronger, bolder

A Post-Mother’s Day Reflection

Posted on May 14, 2024May 13, 2024 By lauren@laurendeweytarr.com

Sunday was Mother’s Day, and if you follow me on social, you already know that I was not at home relaxing, eating breakfast in bed or enjoy a lovely sun-drenched brunch with my kids. I was sitting in the rain at the third round of the NCAA D3 men’s lacrosse tournament, cheering on my oldest.

A Post-Mother's Day Reflection
H in action

I used to get upset that Mother’s Day would come and go without much fanfare or attention given to me. As a matter of fact, in 2022, I blew up at my family and told them (in very dramatic fashion) how they ruined my day. It wasn’t pretty, but it was honest. Brutally so.

To add fuel to the fire, I shared my story in my 2022 Mother’s Day post for the world to see. (Okay, not exactly the world. I need a few more subscribers to make that claim. But you get the point.)

Prior to 2022, my previous Mother’s Day posts were definitely less angry, taking my more typical sarcastic approach to pointing out how my family doesn’t go overboard showering me with love and attention on the Hallmark holiday. I even wrote an LL Cool J-inspired poem (like the true ’90s rap queen that I am) one year. Another year, I bowed out of a Mother’s Day post, admitting to being less than perfect (but still worthy).

In every one of these posts, I claimed not to really mind that I wasn’t getting a real day off to relax. I had learned to lower the bar and my expectations. But the truth is, deep down, I kinda did mind. And by kinda, I mean I cared a lot. I think that’s why I blew up in 2022.

But last year was different.

Last year, Mother’s Day was spent on the sidelines of a college lacrosse field in upstate New York, watching my oldest play in the third round of the NCAA D3 men’s lacrosse tournament. I could have been bitter that I was in Albany, mingling with a crowd while my social anxiety skyrocketed, my stomach churned, and my legs swelled, but seeing the joy on H’s face when his team won was worth it.

This year was even better.

Similar to last year, we were once again on the sidelines of the NCAA D3 men’s lacrosse tourney — only this time, we were much closer to home, so there was no long car ride to endure (gift #1).

With the game not slated to start until late afternoon, my husband orchestrated the day so I could enjoy my morning workout and favorite breakfast stress-free, rather than leave early for the pregame tailgate — which he enjoys but knows makes me anxious (gift #2).

To top it off, H played great (even scored a goal, a feat for a d-pole) and his team won, advancing again to the quarterfinals. He was even selected to do a post-game media interview (gift #3).

And as an added bonus, O lovingly (not begrudgingly) snuggled up with me under a rain-proof blanket and kept me dry with his umbrella when the weather turned ugly (gift #4).

To some, this may not sound like a great Mother’s Day. It may not even sound like it was about me at all. But it was, in more ways than one.

Each of their “gifts” spoke volumes to me, showing me they know what’s important to me. Their acts of service made me feel loved and appreciated, and that’s all I really ever want on Mother’s Day. The flowers are just icing on the cake.

A Post-Mother's Day Reflection
The day before Mother’s Day, celebrating H’s second-round win with my parents (an early Mother’s Day present)
H causing a turnover, then turning it into a goal
I love tulips — and love even more that they remembered that.

If you’re a mother, I hope you were honored on Sunday in a way that makes you feel most loved. And if not, try my 2022 approach — just maybe without as much vitriol.

— LJDT

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  1. Christina Ash says:
    May 14, 2024 at 7:13 am

    Love your articles , and Tulips are also my favorite. We , too, were away for Connors graduation for Mother’s Day. No lacrosse this year for us like the good old days on Mother’s Day. And congrats to Henry and his team.

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