I have a confession to make: Last week, I peed in my neighbor’s shrubs.
Sort of.
Let me explain.
Every morning, I go out for a long walk/jog. I spend the first 30 minutes talking to my mother (she’s the only person I know awake and willing to chat at 6:30 in the morning) and the second 30 minutes jogging as a warm-up to my basement workout session.
Fun fact about me: I have a small bladder. Because of this, I make sure to pee no less than three times before leaving the house to reduce the need to go while walking/jogging.
Unfortunately, three times wasn’t enough last Wednesday.
I was on my way back home but still more than a mile away when I just couldn’t hold it anymore. I had tears in my eyes trying to hold it in. But incontinence pad and Kegels be damned … I was desperate.
So I did it.
I squatted down behind a tree, between the bushes that lined the fence of a local horse farm.
I know, I know. Not exactly ladylike and definitely not demure. Certainly not neighborly and quite possibly against the law.
But it was necessary.
Trust me, I don’t make it a habit peeing in the bushes. As the owner of a small bladder, I pee a lot and am well versed in the location of all the bathrooms along any route I’m traveling.
But what’s a girl to do when she’s out on a country lane? It’s a serious question; what do ultraunners do? If you know, please share so I’m better prepared next time.
In the meantime, I’ll rely on my usual running essentials: sneakers, incontinence pads, and a fourth trip to the bathroom before heading out.
—LJDT
