My mother is many things, but a cheat is not one of them. Unless it’s Mallomar season. Then all bets are off.
If you’ve been a reader of this blog for awhile, you already know my mother—Grace Dewey—is slightly obsessed with these seasonal cookies (read here for a refresher). It is her sole mission every fall is to buy as many boxes as she can, despite her local grocery store’s two-box limit.
In the past, she’s driven to different grocery stores to stock up on these limited edition treats, buying the maximum two at a time at each location. She’s also gone back to the same store moments after leaving, using a different check-out line to avoid detection.
But her local King Kullen has finally caught on to her deceptive ways and revised their policy, no doubt taking her actions into account. In what I affectionately call the Grace Dewey Effect, they’ve now imposed a daily shopper’s limit to avoid return trips by individuals like my mother. The new rule: Two boxes per shopper, per day.
Touché, KK!
My mother justifies her actions by blaming her grandchildren for her need to buy in bulk. After all, she’s sending boxes to each of them. According to her, her behavior isn’t greedy or deceptive, it’s altruistic and just.
So did Grace Dewey abide by the new Mallomar-buying rules?
Considering all five grandsons received two boxes in the mail on the same day, I think it’s safe to say she did not. The only way they’ll be able to stop her is to ban her from the store altogether.
Moral of the story: Nothing can stand between Grace Dewey and her beloved Mallomars … or her grandsons!
—LJDT
