Grateful … and Irritated

In just two days, it’ll be Thanksgiving — a day when many of us gather with family and friends over a big meal and reflect on all the things in our lives for which we are grateful. As it is every year, this entire week, my social media feed will be filled with sappy memes about how #thankful, #grateful, and #blessed everyone is.

Well, I, too, am #thankful, #grateful, and #blessed. I’m (basically) healthy (if you don’t count having an autoimmune disease, osteoporosis, and PTSD), have a warm-ish house (now that we have propane again), a flexible job (freelancing for the win!), a loving family (who definitely knows how to push my buttons), … blah, blah, blah. But I’m also frequently #annoyed, #irritated, and #bothered (and, of course, #brutallyhonest, as you already know).

If you’ve read any of my other blog posts, you know that complaining is in my DNA. It’s part of my charm. I know you’re not supposed to sweat the small stuff, but I do. Aloud — and often. I try not to, but like I said, it’s in my DNA. The older I get, the more curmudgeonly I become.

Now, don’t come at me with your “Good Vibes Only” bullshit. That toxic positivity crap doesn’t work for me. Being positive isn’t my default setting. I have to work on it daily. I write in a gratitude journal, read upbeat memes, follow positive social media accounts, count my blessings, look for the silver linings … I do it all. I believe in it all. But I also get irrationally pissed off by stupid shit at times (PTSD triggers are a bitch!).

Being naturally grumpy doesn’t make me any less grateful, though. It just proves (once again) that I’m a complicated woman; I am grateful and irritated; thankful and annoyed; blessed and bitchy. Case in point: I’m grateful when someone else takes out the garbage, but irritated when that same someone doesn’t replace the plastic bag in the trash can. (It’s part of the job!)

So this Thanksgiving, if you’re like me, counting your grievances along with your blessings, remember to be extra thankful for the people in your life who love you just as you are.

Happy Thanksgiving!

-LJDT