Like just about everyone I know, I could really use a vacation. Personally, I love a good beach getaway. I’m a Pisces, so I’m drawn to water. It calms me and grounds me. Give me a few days to breathe in the sea air, and I’m like a new person. An empty beach is my version of heaven. Toss in a good book, lots of ice cold water, and my ear pods cranking out a solid playlist, and I’ve reached nirvana.
Unfortunately though, a tropical getaway isn’t in the cards for me right now. Luckily, the next best thing recently was — an empty house.
Yes, it’s still true that my house of horrors is killing me softly and I’d much prefer to be elsewhere, but at least my poisonous home was quiet for a few days. For three days, I was alone. No one to nag, step over, work around, cook for, or tend to in any way. It was glorious. Can I get an “Hallelujah!” from my fellow overwhelmed moms and/or anxious introverts?!
I don’t know about you, but I need my space. I need time alone on the daily to recharge so I don’t lose my shit on an hourly basis (no guarantees it won’t still happen on a daily basis, but that’s far better than hourly, I promise you). I wrote about this at length during the beginning of the pandemic because it was a massive shift for me, having everyone home — where I live and work — all the time. Spoiler alert: I did not handle it well. Fast forward nearly 27 months and my husband is still mainly working from home (with me), my oldest is now home again from college (with me), and my youngest is about to begin summer break, so he’ll also be home (with me). Notice a trend? I love my boys (big, bigger, and biggest), but can a girl get a break?
YES, SHE CAN.
Last Thursday afternoon, all three of them left. My oldest was out living his best life on vacation with his buddies, and my husband and younger son spent three days touring college campuses and visiting family and friends. I stayed home.
I didn’t do much. I watched a few bad movies, slept in, worked out, went for a walk, sat in the sauna, shopped at the farmers market, called a few long-distance friends, learned how to use my new washing machine, listened to a couple of podcasts, and wrote this post. I planned to do more, but I was tired. Really fucking tired. So I rested in solitude for the bulk of my 72 hours.
Life is all about perspective. With all the shit currently going on in my life and the world in general, I’m taking whatever tiny wins I can muster — like getting to sleep in the middle of my king-sized bed and walk around the house without pants on for three straight days. It may not have been a secluded beach or a tropical island, but it still felt a little bit like paradise.
-LJDT
