I consider myself a smart, educated individual. I have a college degree and, thanks to both my job and my curious nature, I’m constantly learning something new. But there are still some things that mystify me.
For example:
- Why is it legal in my area to throw sharp needles from my nightly osteoporosis injections, broken mirrors, or a frozen dead cat (sadly, we found one under the shrubs in the winter) in my weekly trash, but not light bulbs?
- Why do I immediate—and urgently—have to pee the moment I park the car in the garage?
- Why do my pockets only snags on the cabinet knobs when I’m in a bad mood?
- Why does my mother always sneeze seven times in a row (never more, never less)?
- Why does my husband sneeze so loudly?
- Why do my parents buy expensive, plush paper towels, but only cheap, single-ply toilet paper?
- Why does traffic happen—and then suddenly clear—when there isn’t an accident or construction causing an obstruction?
- Why do I seem to miss every traffic light, get behind a slow-moving tractor (country life!), or get delayed by a multi-stop school bus only when I’m in a rush and already running late?
- Why do I always get constipated on vacation?
- Why do mosquitoes always find me?
- Why do I keep putting the potato masher in the same drawer, knowing it’s going to get stuck?
- Why do people make their Venmo accounts public (and why do I have to know that you paid Carol for coffee last Tuesday)?
- Why do men still think telling a woman to “calm down” is a good idea?
These are just a few of the things I find truly baffling. Can anyone explain? Or will they forever be, as C+C Music Factor so eloquently declared the year I graduated from high school, “Things that make [me] go hmmm”.
What are you curious about that you can’t explain? I want to know.
—LJDT
